Our world views are so filtered by our past experiences. How does one clean the lens through which we look to see more clearly.
I am at the beginning of a new relationship and find myself slipping back to view things from past experiences. As I dig deeper into this I realize that I still, at the ripe old age of 63, harbour emotional wounds that I thought I was way past. It really is quite funny how these memories cling like leeches onto one’s heart. I will try self talk to see if I can really get to the root of this but I have a feeling that I am scared. Is this natural or not? My new mantra is “IT IS WHAT IT IS”. If I can love myself through this then I can love others with their misty lens from their past. I believe that every person we meet is brought into our lives to teach us, to reflect back those character traits that we are blind to. When I was facilitating adult classes I would us the Jahori Window to demonstrate how we have a blind spot to our own
personality traits we have never been aware of. That is what others reflect back to us, and without this we will blindly go on wondering what is the matter with everyone else when the responsibility for change lies squarely on our own shoulders.
Look in the mirror and see, really see, the person reflected back to you. Being a human with so many experiences under my belt I have to go deep, really deep. Of course I uncover my fear of emotionally unavailable behaviours from past relationships. So I ask myself, “Am I emotionally unavailable and the answer is Yes! I have used this as a coping skill which was learned from my first teacher, my father and the joke is on me…so am I! Well there is always hope and now that I know what this is I can change. It is going to take courage but another characteristic I learned was that I have the power and the will to change and I know I can do it.
My new friend, I am grateful for the mirror. Thank you.
The art of communication has changed. It now comes on an iPhone on a small screen. You text back the reply and back and forth it goes.
It has its very own language. The world has become quieter however, I can’t see the colour of your eyes, the expressions on your face,
your intonations, affects or body language. I am really not sure how you meant that to be taken when I just read a text. I think there must be a lot of mistaken messages that have been taken the wrong way and creates a problem between the two parties trying to get a point across.
One day perhaps you can hear me through mental telepathy and you will pick up the true meaning of what I am trying to say.
Animals don’t use technology and they communicate just fine. We could learn from them.
Skype has helped a lot because now I can see you and of course this has become a standard form for those little phones so it is hopeful.
Especially if you want the love, understanding and compassion to come through. So WHAT COLOUR ARE YOUR EYES?
Denial is a powerful thing and until we bring it to our consciousness where we become aware we stay in an illusion only fooling ourselves.
I had no idea it was so powerful until I started to really open my eyes and see the reality of things. How could my perceptions get so distorted of myself and the world. Waking up takes times and courage to see, really see. My first experience with denial on a large scale was about 20 years ago on my ranch. There was a lot and I mean a lot, of logging going on. We still had trees and some areas were re-seeded.
The pine trees started to die and go brown. There is a mountain in front of the ranch and I watched as it slowly turned rust red across the horizon. Took about some years for the gravity of the situation to really sink in. I was concerned about the trees on the ranch and so
contacted a forester to come have a look. He told me that the pine beetle was only attacking the old pine. It so happens we were standing in a stand of re-planted young pines and you can actually hear the beetle gnawing inside the tree. I looked at him and thought to myself, “does he think I am stupid?!” I then noticed more and more. One day I was driving home and noticed these strange netting contraptions hanging from several trees near the road. Years later I learned that the logging companies had hung beetle bait to lure the beetles to that stand of forest so they could get a lower price for stumpage and clear cut the stand. I met the young forester that was part of the plan and he could not live with himself and left the profession. A lot of people now are leaving professions that promote the brain washing of large money making corporations.
I then noticed the environmental impact on the animals and especially the birds that no longer came. They were gone. I can remember way back in the 1960’s my 11th grade biology teacher telling us that if we didn’t make changes soon these would be the consequences. We are now all living with the consequences. Another slam dunk for me was flying over Bangkok for the first time and seeing the huge brown slurry coming from the river into the ocean. The first time we were there the beach and water was pristine. Two years later we went back and there was no way I was going into that ocean. It is a heart break. So here we are 50 years later and we are still in this mass denial. We buy bottled water and soon we will be buying air to breathe. If the money corporations would grow a conscience they would pour their billions of dollars into healthy energy technology rather than fracking the earth.
On a positive note the small voices are getting louder and louder. My sister the environmental activist and I mean activist, just called because her group succeeded in saving 91% of the forest slated for development. It to 8 years of perseverance. Way to go little sis. We all need to wake up and just look around and change our way of thinking.
The other good news is that people are waking up to the pharmaceutical mess our tradition medicine has succumbed to. The new will of the people is growing stronger and stronger evidenced by the number of options available to eat healthy and believing we are what we eat. People are taking responsibility for their health and one of my favourite channels is FMTV.com. Have an open mind and take a look. It has not been quite 2 months since I woke up to my reality and the results have been miraculous. Wish I woke up a lot sooner.
Change is coming and I pray not too slowly.